Pumpkin Spice Pancakes Recipe

For some reason, any time I make a healthy pancake for my husband, it comes out round, perfect, and fluffy. Any time I make one for myself, it barely holds its shape, or sticks to the pan, or remains too dense. I can only attribute this failure to cooking when I'm hungry, and I don't take the time for my own food that I do for my husband's. Today I remedied this failure, and kept making smaller and smaller pancakes until they came out right. YAY pancake breakfast!

They were delicious, by the way. I'm gonna share my recipe here, because everyone deserves to enjoy light, healthy, delicious breakfasts all through fall, without turning to the sugar laden atrocities that emerge from Starbucks. (Maybe I'm just bitter they don't have a "skinny" pumpkin latte.)

The following recipe has approximately 290 calories (plus 10 for the chocolate sauce), and 24 grams of protein, and 25 grams of carbs.

Pumpkin Spice Protein Pancakes with Ginger Chocolate Sauce

1/2 cup canned pumpkin (not pumpkin pie filling, just the pumpkin)
3 egg whites
1/4 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup water
1 tsp baking powder
1/2 - 1 tsp pumpkin pie spice (to taste)
Pinch ground clove
1/3 cup oatmeal (ground fine to flour texture)
1/2 Scoop Syntha6 Isolate vanilla protein powder
Pam cooking spray

1. Blend together dry ingredients
2. Blend together wet ingredients
3. Blend together wet and dry ingredients
4. Heat a nonstick (if you have one) pan, or a nonstick griddle, or generously coat a cooking pan with Pam.
5. Pour pancake batter, flip pancakes after they begin to bubble, remove from heat after each side has browned and crisped.

To make ginger chocolate sauce, combine:
2/3 cup water
3 packets stevia
1 tablespoon Hershey's unsweetened chocolate powder
Two dashes dried ground ginger

Allow to boil, then lower heat and continue to reduce liquid as you cook the pancakes. After pancakes are finished, pour chocolate sauce over pancakes and enjoy!

Halloween: Slutty ain't Sexy

An Open Letter to Females This Halloween,

      Pumpkin Spice Lattes, the smell of fireplaces starting up, and the inevitable billboards featuring a hooded skeleton have arrived. It’s the time of year when Halloween approaches, and we wonder if we’ve dieted enough to fit into that half-sized mini-costume we believe is what we should wear on a day which USUALLY winds up cold enough to want a sweater by the end of the night. You know the costume.

     You buy it at that Halloween Store that cropped up mid-September; it has a mini-dress, and a headpiece to identify you as the Sexy-Whatever. You may have gone all out and bought the matching thigh-high tights (which you already doubt will stay up right) and/or 6-inch let’s-be-honest-they’re-for-strippers heels to accompany the look. All of your friends coordinated which Sexy-Whatever they were going to be, so at least in YOUR group, there are no repeats. Maybe you did the same last year, and saw your costume repeated in at LEAST six other girls before the night was over. Remember that? Remember not being individual on the one night where you can really break out of the box (or the cheap plastic bag-costume?!) and be something unique?

     Did you watch Miley Cyrus this year, when her performance sparked a HUGE internet blow-up about her performance, her costume, and her choices? Where with one unanimous voice, the internet screamed, “Yeah, you CAN, but maybe you SHOULDN’T. Learn, little girl, the difference between “skanky” and “sexy”.

            There is a huge discrepancy between what you CAN wear, and maybe what you SHOULD wear. Before buying the $19.95 polyester costume that 800 other girls have already bought from that Halloween Store, think for a moment about two things.

One – was this what I would have wanted for myself when I was five? And Two – Will I even be comfortable in this? If your wide-eyed, still-believes-in-magic self at 5 would think you actually look like a lady bug, chances are you’re not in a skintight spotted mini-dress with hooker heels.  Let’s face it, walking or dancing in those heels is gonna hurt within 10 minutes. Let’s not pretend that’s comfortable.

     Don’t get me wrong, there is a time and place for corsets, thigh-highs, and stripper heels. It’s called the Rocky Horror Picture Show, and happens with just such costumes frequently around Halloween. Go. Dress up, enjoy. But maybe, after you do that, give some more thought to what you can be for Halloween, beyond a trying-to-hard near-stripper outfit.

       Frankly, it’s boring. The Mean Girls quote, “Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it” is from 2004. 2004 is almost ten years ago. Ten years of stripper-bees and stripper-firemen is enough, don’t you think? 

     Let’s stop glorifying “looking like a total slut” and instead get creative. Get unique. Break out of your complacent comfort zone of plastic bag costume, and create something that could actually place in a contest. Learn a new makeup technique. Create a contest with your friends that excludes bag-buying. “Trick or Treat” shouldn’t refer to your outfit. Rebel this year, and be something your five-year-old-self would have been proud of. Take pictures that you’ll be proud to show to your own children. Be creative. Be unique. Exhibit your costume skills this year, not your ability to, like every other person, buy a bag for $19.95. I dare you.

Summer Restart!

Hmm, it says a lot that I haven't blogged since my 12 week program ended. That's probably because when it ended, I not only fell off the wagon, I crashed it hardcore into a 6 foot wall of rebound eating.
I took a couple week off training hard at the gym too, my mind and body had achieved a level of burnout I'd never previously known.

Burn out, for me, basically meant I didn't want to go to the gym. I didn't want to lift weights, I didn't want to do cardio. I wanted to eat junk and be indulgent and REST. So I did. And I advocate doing that, if you're the type of person who's able to say after a day or two, "OK, did that. Now it's time to restart, and get back on track." I am not, apparently, that readily able to self-motivate.

Over the past several weeks, I've recommitted several times to eating on-plan, and exercising as prescribed by my 12 week plan. I've made the gym habit these past two weeks, and I'm proud of that. Hitherto, I was being more active in other ways, horse back riding, and even going on a mini surf-trip to Southern CA, which I'll blog about more in the future.

So this is the blog post where I have already reached the conclusion that I need outside accountability and motivation to continue on my fitness journey, at this point in my life. Finding what motivates me, and keeps me going, is absolutely key to my ongoing success. I'm excited to continue my journey, and proud that I've learned more about myself even if doing so made a physical setback in the short run.

I have some new goals!

1. Consistently run 1.5 miles in 13 minutes and under. (Let's start w/twice this week!)
2. Learn some yoga moves, including (by the end of October) The Scorpion.
3. Be able to complete 40 push ups without stopping.
4. Cook one new, healthy recipe a week.

Finding Me!

Forgot to mention, I'm becoming find-able online.

Wanna hear my tweets? @Sarah4Fitness

Want more updates? I'm on Facebook! Sarah4Fitness

I have a website-in-progress, www.sweatnottears.com which mostly links to the above and here.

And of course, you can always message me here or write a response, and I'll try to reply as soon as I can. I'm a social creature, and I welcome feedback!

Headspace; Keeping it Straight

     On May 18, 2013 I completed my first intense 12 week diet and exercise program (that I actually stuck to the whole time!) and as a belated birthday celebration, my husband and I went to Carmel for three days. I thoroughly enjoyed myself the whole time, and that included eating whatever came in range, drinking a few cocktails and wine, (though I avoided beer) and giving my body the break from workouts it's been begging for since the end of April.

      Some disturbing things happened as my diet went bezerk. Rich food, sugar, and alcohol sapped my desire to do even the fun active things I'd planned on, like running on the beach, or going paddleboarding. Instead, I lounged around, cruised from one meal to the next, and snacked on actual candy as I got a magnificent sunburn by the pool. After a candy-binge, loaded with artificial colors, (TMI WARNING, BLUE TEXT AHEAD MAY BE TMI FOR SOME) my poop (EW!) turned blue and then GREEN for two days. Not natural. Not right. Disturbing. And a clear sign that humans are NOT made to consume that artificially colored grossness. Tastes great, but LOOK what happens to your body! That's foul, dude. Foul. I'm a bloated mess after my off-plan time, and it scares me. Incidentally, I won't be weighing myself until NEXT Saturday, to keep my head in a healthy space and not see such an increase that my brain goes, "F&*K it, might as well NOM."

     Tuesday I swam with dolphins, which was my birthday gift to myself. AMAZING experience, and I was pleased that squiggling into a wetsuit wasn't difficult at all. I was reassured that my photos IN said wetsuit looked shapely and not as cetacean-like as I'd felt all day. . . see awesome below!

    Fast forward to Wednesday, when I ate my on-plan breakfast, took my vitamins, and hit leg day HARD at the gym. Still, I decided to skip my customary cardio in favor of a long stretch session. Having "forgotten" my pre and post workout meals, I then ate whatever was handy as I grocery shopped. By now, I should remember NOT TO GROCERY SHOP WHEN HUNGRY. I then came home and ate a bag of Trader Joe's Spicy Mango. Then an old college friend stopped by and we went out to dinner, where I again made questionable choices that were higher in fat than they should have been.

     This is what I'm going to define as A Slippery Slope. Once I put a foot over the edge, even for a predetermined limited time of indulgence, it is SO easy to continue to slide back into bad habits, continuing to eat sugar, and now it feels like I'm starting all over again to rid my body of the cravings and inability to make the RIGHT choices. Why is it now so hard to get back on track? Where did my intense dedication and ability to stick 100% to my mealplan go? What happened to my BRAIN in those several days of break?

     I don't have the scientific evidence to be sure, but I think the moment my body realized it was being offered more food, it went into some kind of post-hibernation binge mode. My challenge, now, is to bring myself back on track, and follow what I'd originally planned, which was to maintain the diet I'd been set by my coach, and only have ONE or maybe TWO cheat meals a week, if social obligations made two easier than just the one. 

I did not plan to have a cheat meal a day.

I did not plan to go entirely off course.

I did NOT plan to skip workouts, or taper off cardio, or set myself back in that way. 

     Waking this morning with the determination born of a new day, I immediately drank 16oz of water, and ate my on-plan breakfast. YAY me. I then put on my gym clothes, so I'd have NO EXCUSE not to  hit the gym for my on-plan workout. YAY GYM. I then made a KILLER vegetable soup, loaded with spinach and other healthy veggies, so I'd have NO EXCUSE not to bang down my veggie servings for the remainder of the week. Getting creative with those meals, now that I have a little more leeway in what I consume, but keeping to my macros and calorie-allowances. I also got rid of the tempt-y foods in the house, that I would have snacked on if the urge hit and my brain wanted to make excuses. Just having that damn mango in the house is too much for my resistance. I can buy it the day OF a cheat meal, then toss the rest, but I CANNOT HAVE temptation in the house.

     Now I feel great! I have chicken breast ready to nom, I have my veggie soup all ready, and I have rekindled my motivation to be who I want to be, which is healthy and strong. Getting back on track for me is all about making it easier on myself, and taking it each step at a time, each meal at a time, each day at a time. If I find my motivation flagging again, I just need to remember how it felt physically after 4 days of indulgence. I don't need that. I don't need BLUE. I'm moving forward, not back, and I'm glad.

12 Week Progress

This is a long-awaited post, at least, I've waited 12 weeks to post it.

In those twelve weeks, I've learned a lot. I've learned a lot about fat loss, about things that work and do not work. I've learned and actually internalized the truth, that gimmicks are snake oil, and fat loss is achieved by what you do and do not put in your mouth, in combination with hard work at the gym. (But mostly what you do or do not put in your mouth!)

I have watched friends and family enjoying wine and cocktails at special events. I have danced sober at a wedding. I have sprinted up countless hills, wallowed in soreness as my hamstrings ached, and repeatedly been reduced to tears over my emotional addiction to some foods.

     I have also watched with pride and wonder as my jeans got baggier, and baggier. I have happily snuggled into jeans which were tight on my body in my fittest college days. I have watched my muscles emerging in the mirror as I do rows and deadlifts. I now deadlift more than my own weight.
I have giggled to myself as I curl more (and with better form, yo!) than the guy next to me at the gym. I have had my world ROCKED when I *effortlessly* did a complete pull up from hanging dead weight. . . and then did another two.

     What has happened in this 12 week transformation plan with my coach Robin Romero from Prissy Sassy Fitness? I have regained control over my own body, and have taken myself to a new level of fitness and health I have never hitherto achieved. I have already outlined the basics of how I did it in my previous posts, but this one is for pictures.

BEFORE:
February 24, 2013
Weight: 153.5 lbs
22.3% Body fat

AFTER:
May 18, 2013
Weight:
17.2% Body Fat

PICTURES
(Before on left, After on right)

The feelings of excitement and pride are so rewarding. I don't remember ever being this weight since junior high, and I know I am more muscular and stronger than I have ever been in my life, as is evidenced here, as I do pull ups.

That was a moment that rocked my world. From no pull ups in my life, to almost ten in one evening. 

This is not the end of my journey, just a really nice scenic viewpoint to pause, reflect, and reaffirm my commitment to a fit lifestyle.

The Change Behind Change

     I'm 8.5 weeks into my first coached fatloss program, and I'm very excited by my changing body and improved fitness levels. I'm harder, tighter, and stronger than I've ever been in my life. Even my sometimes-critical mom notices, she and my father saw me for the first time in 6 weeks last weekend and both kept calling me "skinny".

     (That actually stuck in my craw a little, I'm by NO MEANS skinny, and I kept having my mom poke parts of me to see they were in fact muscularly hard, not skinnyfat. I realized they just didn't have the vocabulary to describe my changing physique accurately, so used "skinny" instead of lean, svelte, cut, whatever.) I told my mom, proudly, "I haven't been this size since Junior High!" She responded, "Sarah, I don't know if you were ever this size. You certainly weren't this SHAPE." Which was intended as a compliment about how I look now, not a dig at how I looked then. (See, sometimes I AM capable of reading intent, not just responding to the words that were said. Sensitivity. I'm learning it.)

     Apart from the changes I'm seeing in my own body, I'm beginning to notice the positives in my own plan (again, thanks to the expertise of Robin Romero and Prissy Sassy Fitness) compared with the circular thinking and results of my previous weight-loss attempts. 

Here's me, pre-weight loss. Approximately 180lbs, on the right, there. 

What I was doing wrong:

Skipping meals to "save calories"

Avoiding "carbs" in the form of grains, and starches like potato

Cardio Guilt: If I ate something "bad" I'd do "extra cardio" to "burn it off"

Not being consistent, I'd stick to something for a week, MAYBE two, before returning to previous habits.

Never kicked alcohol to the curb. 

Weekend Setbacks: I'd be on-plan all week, Monday-Friday, then Friday night through Sunday night it was a free-for-all. Not a cheat meal, not a cheat day, a FREE FOR ALL weekend, which would more than undo any dietary progress I'd made during the week.

     Even when I was lifting heavy and exercising like a maniac (on Jamie Eason's Live Fit Trainer) I didn't lose fat consistently because of the above failures. Now, keep in mind, any exercise, any heavy lifting, those are steps forward. A very out of shape person can lose weight by making small tweaks in their diet or exercise levels. I, however, was at a point where I was cardiovascularly fit, and just was carrying around fat because I was eating wrong to lose it.

What I'm doing right, with guidance:

1.) Eating more small meals throughout the day. 

There is much debate in the diet/bodybuilding world as to whether this makes any difference in metabolism, as claimed by some. I don't know if it does or not, what it does for me is keeps me eating specific foods in specific amounts throughout the day, which staves off hunger and cravings, and stops me from being too hungry leading to a BINGE.

2.) Drinking a gallon of water or more per day.

Drinking water helps you lose fat. Period. Do it. You're made up of water. So are your muscles. WATER, just do it.

3.) I'm sticking to the meal plan. 

Sometimes I get one cheat meal a week. I'm not deviating from what I'm told to do, and I've been doing it for over 8 weeks. This has gotten me results. Consistency. Continual consistency gets results.

4.) Moderate cardio, heavy lifting.

When I say heavy lifting, I don't mean picking up your 7 year old kid during a tantrum. I mean 5+ days a week in a gym, lifting enough weight that by my 10th rep whatever body part is trembling with exertion and is almost unable to maintain form. It's a joy to finish a set of hip thrusters and feel my glute muscles scream in agony. THIS is what is meant by pain=progress.

     Seriously, that's about it. And knowing all this, seeing the differences in my body, it is really beginning to drive me batsh*t when I see friends doing the same circular failings I did when I didn't know any better. All those literal YEARS of dieting or deprivation, for NOTHING. It was so frustrating, to put forth all this effort and sacrifice for weeks on end, only to return to the former state, former weight, and not understand why permanent change wasn't happening for me. I'd explain it away with genetics, with "set weight point", any other myth I chose to believe to justify my stagnation. 

     If you're trying to lose weight, or lose fat, and you're doing it for the x-teenth time and experiencing the same issues you have in the past, TRY SOMETHING NEW. Don't perpetuate the cycle that leads to failure, TRY SOMETHING NEW. 

<Something new? Change. Over on the left, top, is my body 8 and 7 weeks ago. On the bottom is my body as of last Saturday (and a couple weeks back in the jeans. Yes, that is the same pair of jeans worn in both photos.) My body is changing. I'm not using tricks, photoshop, or anything else. These pics can also be seen on my Sarah4fitness profile on bodybuilding dot com, or facebook.>

    

   There is a LOT of misinformation out there, from fad diets (that includes you, Dr. Atkins, CARBS AREN'T THE DEVIL) to gimmicks (can you say pregnancy hormone starvation diet?), to seriously destructive methods of calorie counting like the damn My Fitness Pal app, which teaches you to obsess over the calorie count, and guesstimate what you're burning, and then to EAT MORE to "fill in" the calorie deficit.... NO NO NO. Such a detrimental app in the hands of someone who hasn't been fully educated on what EXACTLY your body really needs to lose fat. 

     Anyway, I'm trying hard not to preach. I'm trying hard not to poke people I see on Facebook or in my real life who keep hopping on the weight-loss carousel for a ride, rather than hopping OFF it in favor of a life change. I just continue on my own path, quietly (for the most part) hoping that when others are ready for true fat loss success, that they'll ask me how I did it, so I can direct them to help. Or hey, if they wait a little longer, until I'm certified as a trainer myself, so I can help them directly. Everyone deserves to have the body they want, and everyone can have it. They need the right tools.

Naught to do with fitness. Just about me.

     What is strength? It is a quality I value. Physically and emotionally, I value strength. My own, and in others. At the same time, my striving towards physical strength is to ensure my emotional strength. Being physically strong buttresses my emotional strength, by allowing the focus of myself and others to be on my physical person, not on who I am deeper inside.
     Emotional strength is relative. One human is not emotionally stronger than another. Like physical alterations, one shouldn't compare one's emotional landscape to anther's, because each person's experiences are unique, and how they feel and grow from each experience differs. One person's grief can be infinite to that person, whereas another might feel little for the same cause.

     I vividly remember being 11 or so, stroking the cat I'd grown up with as the veterinarian slid the needle under his skin that ended his life. I remember tears on my mother's face, and I remember a feeling like something between my lungs and my stomach was hollow, and yet tearing in two, from which echoing sobs seemed to burst. My pain in that moment was infinite, the deepest I'd felt in my young life.
     It is that feeling I attribute to every child who wonders when Mittens will come home, when I see a dead cat on the freeway. I ache for the loss of the innocent animal, the moments they lost they could have had upon the earth, and I grieve for the pain of the child I imagine they left behind, to feel their loss and miss their moments.

A secret about Sarah:
     I'm sensitive. I'm sensitive as HELL. This is a secret few know, because I've spent years building up my defenses. Even so, the death of, or suffering of an animal breaks me down to a puddle of tears. Those save-the-animal commercials, puppies and cats looking miserably into the camera, behind bars or in cages can reduce me to a quivering mess.

     It is the plight of the voiceless that breaks my heart. Animals can't cry out. They can't speak out. They have no way to express their pain, their grief, their hurt caused by humans.

     It is the cruelty and callousness of humans who aren't affected by the vulnerability of the creatures who cannot speak for themselves that I cannot understand. Animals are the ultimate innocent, they are blameless in their actions, as they act only per their instincts and per the training given to them by humans. It is my instinct to protect the innocent, and my inability to do so for the multitude of animals in shelters, in nature, and in homes that suffer from abuse, neglect, and detriment caused by humans that breaks my heart to a point that I am completely useless for myself, any moment I allow myself to acknowledge them. The suffering of the voiceless renders me immobile, able only to grieve and to detest the actions of humans overall. Being made aware of institutionalized cruelty and suffering of shelter animals rendered me useless and nearly immobile yesterday, wanting only to wrap myself up in a blanket and cry in hiding, shedding useless tears for the creatures deserving of acknowledgement.

     This empathy used to extend to moments of human suffering as well, I believe the emotional suffering of a moment can be infinite for the sufferer. In order to operate on a daily basis I have learned to close my awareness to these things, to turn my eyes and head from images of suffering beyond my control and ability to mitigate. Callousness and emotional fortitude are garments in which I clothe and protect myself. Hence, few know I'm sensitive. But I am, and the the innocent and voiceless, the blameless, continue to wrench my heart whenever brought to my attention. My comfort lies in the minute actions I take as often as possible to improve, enrich, or give pleasure or happiness to an animal. I used to gain fortitude from doing all I could to ensure the rights and needs of juveniles within the justice system were met, and I think that loss is what I regret most about no longer working in my previous position. Anyone who's bothered to read thus far may already know this about me. Congratulations if you've read this far, and are now party to my secret. I'm not hard, I'm not cold, I'm a geode, the spark inside hidden to blend in and withstand the pressures of the normal world.
    That spark was lit, recently, by realizing the imminent mortality of my husband's cat, as he grows weaker, thinner, and older. That, combined with an article against PETA, illuminating instances of neglect and willful extermination where mercy and opportunity could have prevented the waste of lives, rendered me useless yesterday. My physical life was derailed by my emotional weakness. I ate off diet. I skipped a workout. Was I doing anything productive in those moments? No. I wandered, I sat idle, I wallowed. I have learned, on the whole, to compartmentalize this particular key to vulnerability, so I can function, but yesterday heart won out. A new day dawned, my determination returned. Back on diet, and now writing as catharsis to work out the heartache that was allowed to surface.

     Working out is my stress relief. It is a physical relief that is an outlet for the emotional or mental stressors in my life. The side effect of increased strength and physical improvement is just the bonus to me. There is more to life than strength. There is more to me than my exterior. If I can, in my life, comfort or enrich the lives of others, particularly the innocent and voiceless, then I believe I've done well.   My strength, emotional and physical, acts as an insulating blanket, guarding my own vulnerability from feeling the hollow tearing of grief. I hope that my potential growth in the fitness industry may lend me increased ability to strengthen and improve the lives of other innocents, animal and human, through my example, my teaching, or my personal touch.
     Everyone has different reasons for their fitness journey, as everyone has individual trials and triggers that touch their heart. What is the reason for your journey? What touches your heart? What motivates you to run, to lift, to move, to get out of bed in the morning? What has the power to render you helpless? And how do you bounce back? Knowing your own strengths and weaknesses is a strength in and of itself, and self-awareness is key to improvement in your own life.

Fighting Illusions, Keep it Real!

     Insecurity is an epidemic among women, regarding their body image. From a very young age, we are conditioned to attach self-worth to our physical image, and we are constantly barraged with the message that we, as we are, are not good enough. I'm going to share something really personal, and embarrassing:

     When I was in first grade, I remember noticing that my legs and arms were larger than some other girls in my class. I couldn't do anything about this, but already "knew" at that age that bigger wasn't better. My tummy was round, too, not protrusive or abnormal for that age, but it wasn't flat. Sometimes it would touch my shirts. It didn't look like the kids or women on tv, so even in first grade, I began to suck in my little 6 year old belly so I'd look thinner. Six. Years. Old. I had already internalized the message that my body in its natural state wasn't right, wasn't good enough. I kept at it, too, holding in my stomach as hard as I could as often as I could remember for most of my childhood, in public. (It surely strengthened my abs, I'll say that, but what did it do to my self-esteem?)
     I remember vividly, when I was 13, at summer camp, a girl told me she envied how flat my stomach was. I felt so proud, that my little trick had worked. She thought I was thin! (The heartbreaking part of that moment is that I was never a fat child, or teen. I was never even pudgy. I was strong, but my mental image of myself was so drastically distorted that I saw myself as a fat girl, when in fact, I was lean, see me at that age on the right.)

     Without delving into the social and media implications of these statements, I think it's fair to say these statements affect many of us, and I do not claim to be an exception. It is incredibly difficult to see ourselves honestly, let alone share ourselves with others.  I still struggle to stand naked in front of a mirror without sucking in my stomach, or flexing some part of my body to maintain the image I like to have of myself.

     Imagine then, the struggle I had against my own insecurities, as I was asked by my coaches to take "before" pictures, of my body in its current natural state, without sucking in, or manipulative posing, or any tricks to appear "better" than I am. I trust my coaches. I trust their confidence, I trust their expertise, and I trusted them to take me to a different physical place. NOT giving them the honest me would have been a disservice to them, and to myself as part of my journey. A clear and honest starting point is essential to my development, and I knew that, so I sucked it up, and let it out, and stood in full lighting without a tan, or sucking in, or anything, in my littlest bikini to show my coaches what they were working with.

     Okay, so I did it. I sent out honest pictures to my coaches. I even took more and posted them publicly as part of a BSN Summer Shred contest, telling myself it's OKAY to look "crappy" in my before photos, that's the whole point, so you can improve heartily from that point.

     The next big mental challenge was my check-in photos. One part of me was totally confident in my coaching, and my own dedication to the plan I was given, and that progress would happen naturally as my coaches ran my program they way the know best. Another part of me was scared. Is scared. Will continue to be scared that my progress is slower than my peers. That my body isn't changing the way it should be, at the speed my coaches (or others!) would expect. Every time I send out a progress update, I quake inside, fearing that even by the end of my 12 week period, I won't have made the kind of progress I've seen in others' progress photos.

     Some of my coaches' clients have posted progress pictures, and they're AMAZING. Waists have been whittled, thighs have shrunk, and butts have become beautiful, round little melons of awesomeness. I do not see these changes in myself. Even more intimidating, these described changes have happened QUICKLY for others, and I don't see the same rate of change in me. This is scary. This is intimidating. This makes the insecure little 6 year old in me want to suck in that belly, flex those ab muscles, tan my hide and tweak my poses in my photos to try to achieve the visual differences I see in others.

     I won't do it, though. I'd be cheating. I'd be cheating ONLY myself. My coaches aren't dumb. They know their sh*t. They can tell differences in lighting, in posing. They know what sucking in looks like. They know all the tricks, because if *I* know them, I know they know them. WE ALL know what a sucking-in-photo-manipulation looks like, because we've ALL done stuff like that to make our facebooks better, to improve our myspaces, or our avatars on whatever social media we give a damn about. We've untagged ourselves in candids that showed our unflattering angles. We may not know the extent of photoshop retouching done on any given magazine cover or ad, but we sure as hell know how to tweak ourselves to make ourselves look "our best," and those tricks are easy to spot when any other amateur is workin' 'em.

     So I won't cheat. I'll keep on progressing at my little snail pace. The point is I'm progressing, and I'm being honest with myself and my coaches, because anything else will hinder my progress more than a momentary ego boost of "Hey, lookit THIS progress pic compared to week 1! It's AMAZING!!!" I want to be AMAZING for real, not AMAZING at manipulation. I want to be able to walk around a beach in my tiny bikini, and NOT be sucking in, ever again. I want to focus on the beauty around me, not how I look at any given moment.
     Earnest change, honest change, is the real change I want to see in myself, for myself. Being cheated on is one of the worst feelings in the world, and I won't do that to myself. I'm focused on overcoming my insecurities, rather than hiding them, and that will make all the difference.

How to eradicate STRESS from your life

Stress. 

     "I'm so stressed out!"
     "My life is SO stressful right now!"
     "Oh, I can't get xyz done, I'm too stressed."
I can teach you, in one sentence, how to completely eradicate stress from your life.

Want to know how?

Get a more descriptive vocabulary.

     No, really.
     "Stress" can be almost anything, and "having stress" is synonymous with BREATHING. Your body is under stress every day: pulled muscles, aches, pains, illnesses, constantly fighting germs and even the effect of gravity can cause physical stress. You give yourself physical stress by exertion, whether willfully exercising, or inadvertently having to dash for the bus you're about to miss.

     Stress can be emotional. Your dad could be diagnosed with cancer. You may have just had a spat with your significant other. Your time of the month may be pending, and you're late, or don't have access to chocolate you crave. You may have just started a diet, compounding physical stress with mental deprivation of foods you want, double stress!

     Stress can be mental. Overloaded with projects at work. Starting a new job. Keeping a difficult job! Hating your boss. Loving (bow chicka bow wow) your boss. Stress. Stress. Stress.

     Now here's the secret: EVERYONE has stress. It's a constant in everyone's life, all the time. From the aboriginal tribesman to the modern day white-collar Wall Street exec, everyone has some kind of stress. Now that we're all on equal footing, let's get over it.

     No, really.
     Saying, "I'm stressed," as an excuse for any kind of non-capable, non-adult behavior is just that. An excuse. Not a valid reason.
     "I just can't handle this, I'm too stressed." How many of us have heard that as an excuse for why something didn't get done, and now WE have to handle it? I bet everyone has heard that. Doesn't make it acceptable. Ten times out of ten, I'd rather someone took responsibility for their failing and ask for help, rather than blame their failing on the ever-present scapegoat, Stress.
     Don't tell me you're "stressed." Tell me the STRESSOR. I'm much more likely to be sympathetic to,
"Sarah, I couldn't meet you at the gym like we'd arranged because I over scheduled my day. I was late waking up because my boyfriend snored all night, I was late getting my kid to their doctor's appointment, and as I rushed to get home I accidentally tapped the car in front of me, so I had to deal with that."
     Specifics. Not just "I've had a stressful day." I care very much about your individual trials. I don't give a crap that it "stressed you out."

     Adults have standards of behavior that should be met. Don't let "Stress" be your excuse for rudeness, laziness, or making other people deal with your problems. If you have to get help, be specific as to why, and frankly, it doesn't hurt to apologize for your own shortcomings to those who will then be helping you. Let's ALL eradicate "Stress" from our vocabularies.

Tips on how to handle your day-to-day "Stress":

• Exercise. (Of course I advise this!) A quick 20 minute workout reintroduces endorphins to your system, and can decrease the effects of cortisol, which is the "stress hormone." Exercise more.
• Sleep. Get adequate sleep. The average adult needs approximately 7 - 9 hours of sleep per night. Find your ideal sleep pattern by going to bed at the same time every night, and allowing yourself to wake up naturally the next morning without an alarm. (Some may have to start this process on the weekend, as a body operating on a sleep deficit may oversleep at first, causing us to miss work!)
• Eat healthy foods, avoid processed foods. Fruits, vegetables, whole grains and lean proteins help the body function, which in turn allows the body to handle more of the day-to-day issues that arise in a healthy manner. Avoid processed foods and sugar.
• Avoid alcohol. A glass of red wine in a bath can be a fine de-stressing wind-down to a day, but getting home after fighting traffic and immediately mixing yourself a double vodka martini is only going to compound your stress problems down the line.
• Talk. It's okay to vent to friends, humans bond over shared problems. 
• Physical touch. Engage in more touch. Whether cuddles with kids, pets, a significant other, or booking a massage, humans respond with relaxation to increased physical touch.
• My personal favorite: Immerse yourself in water. Whether it be taking a bath, hopping in a hot tub, a hot shower, or a quick swim in the pool, somehow the feel of water on our body helps to relax us. 

     If you have any additional unique and healthy ways to combat "Stress," please feel free to email me or add them in a comment below. I always welcome new techniques!

Magazines

     Well, after reading the latest Women's Health, to which I've had a subscription for years, I got off my butt and cancelled this worthless subscription this morning. I got irritated last night as I flipped through the Katherine McPhee featured mag, seeing NO muscle tone on any of the models, including the featured McPhee. So many articles about beauty, makeup, hairstyles, and only scant mentions of fitness.
     What really sealed the deal was reading the workout which advised using 8-12lb dumbbells 3 times a week to work out various parts of the body. Head, meet wall. Repeat. This stupid magazine seemingly perpetuates the myth that if women lift anything heavier than their own boobs, they'll turn into this:

(And hey, if you DO want to look that way, more power to you! It's not everyone's aesthetic of choice, but mad props to the women who put forth that kind of effort and determination to build the kind of body that takes that much hard work. No body deserves ridicule.)

     But let's be real: the average female who lifts weights, even (gasp) HEAVY weights (like, your own bodyweight! More than that! ERMAGERD!) won't look like that woman featured above without actually intending to get there. Magazines and articles that perpetuate this myth are detrimental to women, and fitness. Here's a woman who lifts heavy weights, and competes in fitness competitions:

See the difference? I'm not saying one kind of body is better/preferable to the other, but I want to point out the serious visual differences between what perception of weightlifters is versus the reality. For the record, this particular writer and fitness enthusiast would prefer to look like the strong and beautiful Jamie Eason (pic 2), but that body also takes hard work and relentless dedication to eating habits.

     Now, maybe other bodies can achieve the kind of results they want with 8 pound dumbbells, but my body didn't change until I picked up the heavy weights, and put down the processed foods. If you're looking to be genuinely strong, and want a magazine to help you carve away the fat while leaving you fit and healthy, and able to maintain a newly de-fatted body, please check out Oxygen over Women's Health. Doing so has made a huge difference in how I view myself, my goals, and how I've gone about losing 30 pounds of fat while increasing my muscle mass and lowering my BMI. I'm still a work in progress, but that below is 180 to 150lbs. If I can do it, ANYONE can.

Product Review: Last1Standing!

     I recently realized I'm spending way too much money on sports and fitness gear, clothes, and products, so I might as well share my experiences with others about the good, the bad, and the ugly of what I've found. (Mostly, I'll laud the items I can no longer live/workout without!)

     My first review will be for a newer company, that was recommended to me through Facebook, called Last One Standing. Check them out online HERE! I was super excited to order one of their limited-edition hoodies, when I saw they had one that was BRIGHT FREAKIN' BLUE I knew it was meant to be. The back of the hoodie shouts: I AM THE ONE, in bright pink, black, and white. On the left breast of the front of the hoodie is the company's logo, again, in bold pink, black, and white. The design is slightly reminiscent of tattoo style, and contrasts perfectly with the bright aqua color of the hoodie material.

     The hoodie is super soft, and lightweight, which will be perfect for early morning runs or transport to and from the gym for the rest of the season. Did I mention the inside is soft? Like, baby kittenfloof soft. I unwrapped this gem last night, and snuggled into it immediately. I was also excited to pull it back on this morning, I could live in this thing. 

     I should also give props to the company for an easy to use and navigate website (even from my iPhone!) and the fastest shipping I've ever had the pleasure of experiencing. It was about two days from ordering the hoodie to having it in my hand, for $5 shipping. Absolutely awesome.  I may update down the line after I wash and wear it for a while. Verdict at this time? TRY THIS COMPANY!

Turn YOUR Fat into MUSCLE!!!

     Do you want to go from flabby to fit? From soft to hard? Do you dream of changing your fat into hard, admirable muscle?  I can tell you the secret to MAKE THAT HAPPEN, friend!

     And if you believe that, I've also got a timeshare on Mars I'd like to sell you. You arrive by TARDIS, and ride magical unicorns that fart See's candy. 

   THE TRUTH

     The truth is: it is impossible to turn fat into muscle. Fat is made up of cells. Fat cells. Muscle is made of up of cells. MUSCLE cells. You cannot magically turn one kind of cell into another, any more than you can turn your brain tissue into gluteal tissue. It just won't happen, no matter how big a butthead you are. You CANNOT turn one kind of cell into another.

     You CAN grow or shrink your fat cells. Eat a lot of junk and live a sedentary lifestyle, you can enlarge your fat cells or grow more of the squishy little buggers. Even when you lose fat through fit lifestyle and proper eating, you cannot GET RID of those fat cells. The only way to get rid of them is through liposuction, which literally sucks the cells out of your body and they're gone for good. (Until you go and create more.) 

     You CAN strengthen and grow your muscle cells as well. Strength training and proper diet can increase your muscle, increase your strength, and increase your metabolism all of which help to maintain a healthy weight, and help to eliminate fat from your  body. 

     I can't tell you how many times I see "turn fat into muscle in 3 easy steps" or some other such ludicrous claim. If you have a trainer, or a program, or a fat loss supplement that claims to "Turn fat" into ANYTHING, I'd seriously reconsider using that product, person, or program. It's an ignorant and misused claim, and you owe yourself better than getting duped by false promises. 

     Go out there. Build some muscle by weightlifting and eating right. LOSE some fat mass by avoiding processed foods and not overeating. But even when your new toned muscles start to come through, don't fool yourself into believing you somehow converted one kind of cell into another. You're not an alchemist. You're a person on their path to fitness. 

Inner Strength

     As I'd read others' progress and blogs and transformation stories, they all seem to have common themes that run throughout. One such theme is the Other People Don't Get It / Peer Pressure theme, and I'd always kind of dismissed it as a person's own weakness working itself out. I'm now experiencing this phenomenon firsthand, and it's not. easy. to. dismiss.

     Last night, my husband, meaning no ill, said offhandedly, "Hey, you should ask your coaches if you get a cheat meal this weekend, cuz if you don't, I'd like to go out with some other people so it won't be weird. You're no fun anymore." He didn't say this with cruelty, or with intent to hurt, but let me tell you, I haven't been able to get it out of my head ALL DAY.
     Number one, the insinuation that going out to dinner with me is weird. Yeah, it is. I know this. I eat out of tupperware now, and don't order food or drinks. I drink from my shaker bottles, and drink water. I totally understand how this would be less awesome than sharing off my plate, trying new things, or feeding each other romantically off forks.
     Two, I also understand that it's less fun to drink with someone who's not drinking. When I say drinking, I mean alcohol, obviously. I don't think drinking tons of water qualifies as "fun," either. It makes ya pee frequently, and it doesn't make you goofy.
    Three, and possibly the saddest, is the possibility of not only missing out on the food others are enjoying, but missing out on the experience and company because someone would rather eat with others who are eating "normally" than with ME. Forget relationship, forget personality, it all comes down to what you put in your mouth in public? Could that be any harsher?

     So needless to say, I was hurt and sad, and more than a little angry at that offhanded comment, and how it affected my mood for the rest of the day. I turned to my coach, who helped me get my head on straight by illuminating my priorities. I can't let someone else's opinion of my adjusted lifestyle be more important than my progress, or my efforts and days of eating right will be compromised. There's a way I want to be, and I've NEVER said my goals are to make others happy with what I'm eating, or how I look, or how strong I am.
   
     That said, here's an open request to people not dieting: you wouldn't look at your fat friend's plate, see they had fried chicken, and say, "Hey, are you sure you should be eating that? Hello cause/effect." Why? Because it's totally rude, hurtful, and socially unacceptable. You wouldn't tell an anorexic friend that they look "gross so skinny," again, because it's hurtful and detrimental. But to comment that it's weird for a fit person to bring their own meal is totally socially acceptable. You can joke with a fit friend that they're "obsessed with the gym." They're the ones society hasn't yet decided deserve the same sensitivity to their physical differences and needs. I'm in no way comparing being fit to being fat, or having an eating disorder. I'm just asking that everyone be sensitive to everyone else's eating habits and needs, and maybe avoid negative commentary altogether. Please. Because there's a strong chance my current sensitivity to this topic has a lot to do with craving exactly what you're eating right now. And I've used up all my willpower to NOT go eat it, so what's left is my brain without willpower saying PLEASE BE NICE TO ME.

Week One Update

     My husband is sitting on the couch, eating his second piece of Round Table King Arthur Supreme pizza, generously dipped in ranch sauce. The smell is, predictably, delectable. *I* am having my 5th meal of the day, brown rice and protein shake. I was a LITTLE naughty with it, I blended it with loads of ice and a drizzle of almond extract, then topped it with a teaspoon of honey and bee pollen. Eating it with a spoon makes it a lot more like a dessert, and that's fun.

     Part of the issue with being on a strict diet, when not everyone around you is, is that eating is a human HOBBY. It's social, it's part of entertaining, it's got ties to emotion, and it can be a lifestyle. I suffer from being a huge fan of really great food, (I hate the self-promoting term "foodie," it's so pretentious and elitist) and that means NOT eating really great food makes me sad. I do not mourn missing out on Round Table, but I put my foot down when he suggested going out for Deep Dish pizza from a place I DO love. NOT till cheat meal time, babe. Thanks.

     Good news is I'm really digging the workouts I'm on! My body is so much stronger than it was when I began my previous 12 week program, it's really rewarding to see the weight and my definition increasing. On the left is the second workout on the new plan, gonna update weekly!

      I also am putting conscious effort into NOT laughing (in my head) at guys who come in acting obnoxious, posturing, snickering at others as they try to weasel onto whatever equipment they want, then lifting less than me on said equipment. 

     Let me be clear, I don't care if you lift less than me. I don't care WHAT you lift. But if you're acting like a donkey, then lift with crap form and low weight, I REALLY TRY not to judge you. I try. It's a journey of personal betterment, right? Cuz right now, I may be a little judgy. SHHHH.

     I am actually really happy at the gym. Happy, feeling fit and strong, and having fun with photos! Gonna start updating them here, cuz I tweet them daily. (@Sarah4Fitness on twitter, btw!)

Not Cheating Eating Out

     OkeyDOKEY, progress! Five days in, I went out to dinner with my husband and friends to a local margarita bar and Mexican restaurant. (Why would I do that to myself? WHY? WHY?!? You may ask. . . read on!) The Husband desperately wanted to go out to dinner, and what kind of person would I be to deny him that enjoyment? Therefor, I artfully orchestrated an outing to a kind of cuisine I can actually pass up without too much regret. I originally suggested Indian food (call me a weirdo, but I'd RATHER eat restrictive "diet" food than Indian cuisine. Curry and coriander just really doesn't do it for me,) but Mexican was settled upon by all. Fine with me. Harder for me to pass up their creative margaritas than the food, to be honest.

     Thus, on a Friday night, armed with festive-colored AminoX and a protein smoothie in shaker bottles, and my Snapware full of portioned out mealfoods, I went out into the world. I was promptly rewarded by my AminoX leaking all down my bag and pants. (That is, no matter what I carry it in, ALWAYS the leakiest dang beverage in the world. It's never the WATER that leaks, no, it's the apple-scented stuff.) WHATEVER.

     We make it to our seats. Server asks us what we'd like to drink. Husband orders a pint of beer. (God, that sounds so good, it was a hot day, I'd just showered from my workout, a pint of beer, mmm,) and I ordered a glass of water, and a glass of ice. Drank said water, pounded my protein shake while others enjoyed their drinks. They then ordered their food, and I explained to our server that "I have allergies, so I had to bring my own." Somehow, I imagine people will respond better to an allergy explanation, than a "You don't serve anything on this menu I can eat right now, and I don't trust your cooks to make anything off menu that I specify will fit the parameters of my dietary needs." Nope. "Allergies." 'Nuff said.
     So I then got to sit there, smelling my husband's and friends' food, as they nommed down on cheesy burritos, greasy porky carnitas, and chips. Oh, and fabulous colored margaritas. I tried not to say ANYTHING about my own food. I tried not to make faces as I continued to eat (oh so slowly, the chewing is exhausting, I swear) long after their plates were done. I felt supremely self conscious about my first Eating Out experience, but no one but me seemed to feel it was that weird. Which was nice. There wasn't even peer pressure to drink, which was a welcome change from the last time I ate out with friends while dieting. All in all, the evening was a success.

     What really hit me was, as we walked to Baskin Robbins for my husband's dessert (OMG, right? Cruelty!) he put his arm out for me to take, and said, "I'm really proud of you. You didn't even consider cheating. That had to be really hard." And I thought about it, and realized that I hadn't even really thought about cheating on my plan. I just didn't see it as an option. And that's. . .awesome.

     Of course, it doesn't hurt that I was wearing my "I bought them just a little too tight but will eventually fit them" jeans, and they were fitting perfectly. It also didn't hurt that I'd been reading posts from coaches, friends, and role models all day who were at the Arnold Fitness 2013 all day, and who had lots of pictures of themselves looking amazing and fit and happy. The real kicker though, was that I actually cheated again this morning. I got on the scale before Weigh In Day. And I was down 3 pounds. I'm finally making the kind of progress I want, and I'm happy about it. I refuse to wash it away on a night of margaritas and food I wouldn't even choose for my "cheat meals". I can achieve my goals.  Every little triumph like this gets me one step closer.

Day 3, Cravings and Dreams

     I've had no problem following my fitness coaches' advice to a T so far (ooh, big accomplishment, 48 hours in) and that includes putting asparagus in my facehole despite my aversion to the stuff, but today I did something I was told I oughtn't do.
    I went and weighed myself. Why on EARTH would I do this, two days in? WHY? Well, in the past going from eating whatever to eating clean, I'd seen a daily pound loss every time I hopped on the scale. Not today. :( I was exactly the same as my original weigh in, which was totally disheartening. I know in my HEAD that changes happen when I eat right, and the longer I stick to eating right the better the results will be; it's that emotional tie to the scale that I need to shake. I want to see results, and I want to see them NOW! Seeing results is what motivates me to continue forward with the diet and the exercise, but mostly the diet.
     So weird that last night I had my first big sugar craving. My husband was eating sweet tarts, which I normally think is basically flavored chalk, but at that moment, I WANTED them. And a waffle with syrup. Sprinkled with nerds. (Like, seriously?? SERIOUSLY. I wanted to eat like a 6 year old kid dropped off in Candyland with a magic credit card and a spork.) I did NOT eat them though.
 Mantra: I will be compliant. I will be coachable.
Then, in my sleep, I had vivid dreams of being seated at a lazy susan table with my extended family, everyone ordering their favorite Chinese and Japanese food, most of which was deep fried, covered in sugary sauces, and crunchily delicious. I know they were delicious, because in my dream, I allowed my self to take little bites of the crab rangoon, the fried salt and pepper crab, and lots of fresh sushi. As I did, I suddenly remembered I'm supposed to be on a healthy eating plan, and I woke myself up with an exclamation of "NO! I'm not eating that!" And there was a feeling of guilt and failure when I woke, which is a lousy way to start my day. While on one hand it was nice to crunch through the things I'm not actually going to eat for a while, it really hit home that I have what may actually be food addictions.

     Like many, I know what foods are good for me, and what ones I should avoid if I want to reach my goals. It's a little-picture/big-picture issue for me now. The little picture is my food cravings, and bad habits I miss. The big picture is the body I've always wanted and genuinely believe I can attain.
     I'm so grateful that I've finally signed on with actual coaches, who will guide me and keep me honest as I continue to push towards the body I want MORE than sugar and fry. I'm also not going to weigh myself again until I'm supposed to, because I don't want to have the disappointing feeling I had this morning. I'm also going to be working my heart out on my cardio at the gym today, due to the moment of sad after the scale. Anything I can do to accelerate my progress is worth it.

Sickness

     A couple years ago, I'd use any excuse to skip the gym. Stubbed my toe, gotta nurse that. Got a runny nose, better stay home! To the point of OMG Hangnail, better "go home first" and take care of it or it'll annoy me at the gym! These excuses led to my ongoing inability to lose weight. They led to my sense of failure, and they led to my negative self image.

     Now, I am one of those weird people who continue to work out unless they're confined-to-bed sick. After getting home from Seattle, my throat was swollen and sore, but I powered through it to enjoy my weekend, and it got me worse (or that may have been the natural progression of this bug) but I'm not skipping the gym ESPECIALLY on my new program because of a little head-bug.
     Despite coughing up something that looked like a small treefrog, armed with Dayquil and Mucinex, I go, I lift my weights, I do my cardio, but I make sure to wash my hands and wipe down my equipment so I won't share my nasty with others.

     I really, really hate being sick. I really hate being sick starting out this new plan, even though my stuffed up nose doesn't let me taste the asparagus I despise as much. What's really funny about this plan, is I'm in day 2, and I'm already tired of chewing. There is SO MUCH FOOD I have to eat, but it's low calorie, high nutrient food, so I'm probably flooding my poor sick system with precisely what it needs; good nutrition and vitamins while it works out this nasty bug.
     I'd like to update that while I was dubious about my prescribed workout yesterday (I'd been doing much more intense workouts with intervals, high intensity cardio, and mid-set cardio spikes) I felt how effective my heavy weights were this morning when I hauled myself out of bed. I'm SORE. Sore for the first time in a long time. Like, not ouchy that's uncomfortable sore, but can I walk today will I be able to walk tomorrow sore. It's nice. While I'm no fan of pain, I know it's my body remaking itself stronger and to me, that's a great feeling. It's fantastic to know my time in the gym is a success, not just going through the motions to say I went. Change. It's happening. Now if I could just get rid of this danged head cold!

BACKTRACK

ERMAGRRRRD.

Spent a week in the rainy winter of Seattle, and though I got to experience the David Barton gym a couple days, I did NOT eat well and resultingly am feeling soft, squishy, and gross. I'm so painfully aware that my progress has been halted by my diet, that I finally made a decision. I made a commitment to myself. I made a financially backed choice to join a team, and get a coach (two, actually!) and change my body and my lifestyle 100%.

I want to share my ongoing progress as I have joined Prissy Sassy Fitness and am beyond excited to have two gorgeous, accomplished, and amazingly fit women guiding me towards my goals, as of this coming Monday!  (Check them out of Facebook!)

Doing my personal assessment has become a matter of habit, but sticking to a diet is going to be new for me. So will be the results I believe I am capable of. My pics today. . .so not proud. But you know what? I'll be proud of them when I've improved against them. And since I'm so not proud of how I look right this minute, I'm going to post those pics only when I've seen a comparable change. Come on, Monday!

Alcohol

     This is such a touchy subject, but in fitness, there's only one right answer regarding the use of this substance. Alcohol is detrimental to any fitness programs or goals. Period. It has several effects, none of which accelerate fat loss or help build muscle. This means its consumption is counterproductive to my goals.

Negatives:

• Slows metabolism
• Has empty calories
• Lowers inhibitions, such as willpower to refrain from straying from diet
• Body feels lousy after consumption, and workouts suffer the next day

     These are just a FEW of the negatives I experience, without the scientific citations to back up additional claims about the detrimental effects, I don't want to list more. 

     Knowing the negative effects alcohol has on my fitness, I decided to stop drinking ANY alcohol for the  first month of the new year. It has been eye opening for several reasons. I have been upset to learn how hard it is for me to abstain continuously from alcohol. I do not know if it is something inherent inside me, or if it is simply because our adult American culture is pervaded by alcohol. The longer I avoid drinking, the more I realize how ingrained in our society alcohol is.

     It's there at breakfasts, in Bloody Marys and Mimosas. It's certainly there for brunch. It's a beer at lunch, or to accompany watching football. It's the thought of a glass of wine as you destress in a bubble bath. It's on every television commercial set, it's on every television show. We celebrate with alcohol, we socialize with alcohol, we destress with alcohol. Alcohol is as inherent to watching sporting events as consuming water is to participate in them.

     I do not believe I am an alcoholic, but I deeply believe our culture is. Obviously it is possible to choose to avoid it, but there is almost a stigma against those who choose to avoid alcohol as a lifestyle. The perception "Ooh, are they an alcoholic?" or "Are they hiding a pregnancy?" or "Maybe they just can't handle their liquor," all carry negative or judgmental connotations. Then, if it's determined that a person avoids alcohol for fitness reasons, there is a defensiveness to contend with. "Huh, so if I drink, do they think I'm not fit? Do they think they're better than me? How self-righteous."

     I was actually called "self righteous" by a close friend as I reflected out loud on the pervasiveness of alcohol in our society. I don't in any way intend to come across as self-righteous, I'm just trying to explore the balance of societal implications versus my own nature. It bothers me that avoiding alcohol has been so hard. I'm bothered by looking forward so much to the day when I've decided I'm going to have my next drink (set because I'm going to a particular event where yes, I would like to drink). It bothers me to consider that I do see alcohol consumption as a fun part of my lifestyle. It's like in high school, where the DARE officers tried to emphasize that you CAN have fun without alcohol. It bothers me that it seems much of our society has forgotten that.

     If I'm going to continue on my fitness journey, I have learned that my progress will be intensely accelerated by avoiding drinking. I have learned that I am able to avoid drinking, and while it is challenging, I know now that I CAN do it. I'm excited to see how my body continues to change for the better, and I'm more than thrilled to treat myself to an endorphin rush instead of a cocktail as rewards for my progress. That said, I'll know I can enjoy the occasional adult beverage without the worry it will derail my fitness goals, because forward motion won't be halted by minor trips.