Halloween: Slutty ain't Sexy

An Open Letter to Females This Halloween,

      Pumpkin Spice Lattes, the smell of fireplaces starting up, and the inevitable billboards featuring a hooded skeleton have arrived. It’s the time of year when Halloween approaches, and we wonder if we’ve dieted enough to fit into that half-sized mini-costume we believe is what we should wear on a day which USUALLY winds up cold enough to want a sweater by the end of the night. You know the costume.

     You buy it at that Halloween Store that cropped up mid-September; it has a mini-dress, and a headpiece to identify you as the Sexy-Whatever. You may have gone all out and bought the matching thigh-high tights (which you already doubt will stay up right) and/or 6-inch let’s-be-honest-they’re-for-strippers heels to accompany the look. All of your friends coordinated which Sexy-Whatever they were going to be, so at least in YOUR group, there are no repeats. Maybe you did the same last year, and saw your costume repeated in at LEAST six other girls before the night was over. Remember that? Remember not being individual on the one night where you can really break out of the box (or the cheap plastic bag-costume?!) and be something unique?

     Did you watch Miley Cyrus this year, when her performance sparked a HUGE internet blow-up about her performance, her costume, and her choices? Where with one unanimous voice, the internet screamed, “Yeah, you CAN, but maybe you SHOULDN’T. Learn, little girl, the difference between “skanky” and “sexy”.

            There is a huge discrepancy between what you CAN wear, and maybe what you SHOULD wear. Before buying the $19.95 polyester costume that 800 other girls have already bought from that Halloween Store, think for a moment about two things.

One – was this what I would have wanted for myself when I was five? And Two – Will I even be comfortable in this? If your wide-eyed, still-believes-in-magic self at 5 would think you actually look like a lady bug, chances are you’re not in a skintight spotted mini-dress with hooker heels.  Let’s face it, walking or dancing in those heels is gonna hurt within 10 minutes. Let’s not pretend that’s comfortable.

     Don’t get me wrong, there is a time and place for corsets, thigh-highs, and stripper heels. It’s called the Rocky Horror Picture Show, and happens with just such costumes frequently around Halloween. Go. Dress up, enjoy. But maybe, after you do that, give some more thought to what you can be for Halloween, beyond a trying-to-hard near-stripper outfit.

       Frankly, it’s boring. The Mean Girls quote, “Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it” is from 2004. 2004 is almost ten years ago. Ten years of stripper-bees and stripper-firemen is enough, don’t you think? 

     Let’s stop glorifying “looking like a total slut” and instead get creative. Get unique. Break out of your complacent comfort zone of plastic bag costume, and create something that could actually place in a contest. Learn a new makeup technique. Create a contest with your friends that excludes bag-buying. “Trick or Treat” shouldn’t refer to your outfit. Rebel this year, and be something your five-year-old-self would have been proud of. Take pictures that you’ll be proud to show to your own children. Be creative. Be unique. Exhibit your costume skills this year, not your ability to, like every other person, buy a bag for $19.95. I dare you.