I've had no problem following my fitness coaches' advice to a T so far (ooh, big accomplishment, 48 hours in) and that includes putting asparagus in my facehole despite my aversion to the stuff, but today I did something I was told I oughtn't do.
I went and weighed myself. Why on EARTH would I do this, two days in? WHY? Well, in the past going from eating whatever to eating clean, I'd seen a daily pound loss every time I hopped on the scale. Not today. :( I was exactly the same as my original weigh in, which was totally disheartening. I know in my HEAD that changes happen when I eat right, and the longer I stick to eating right the better the results will be; it's that emotional tie to the scale that I need to shake. I want to see results, and I want to see them NOW! Seeing results is what motivates me to continue forward with the diet and the exercise, but mostly the diet.
So weird that last night I had my first big sugar craving. My husband was eating sweet tarts, which I normally think is basically flavored chalk, but at that moment, I WANTED them. And a waffle with syrup. Sprinkled with nerds. (Like, seriously?? SERIOUSLY. I wanted to eat like a 6 year old kid dropped off in Candyland with a magic credit card and a spork.) I did NOT eat them though.
Mantra: I will be compliant. I will be coachable.
Then, in my sleep, I had vivid dreams of being seated at a lazy susan table with my extended family, everyone ordering their favorite Chinese and Japanese food, most of which was deep fried, covered in sugary sauces, and crunchily delicious. I know they were delicious, because in my dream, I allowed my self to take little bites of the crab rangoon, the fried salt and pepper crab, and lots of fresh sushi. As I did, I suddenly remembered I'm supposed to be on a healthy eating plan, and I woke myself up with an exclamation of "NO! I'm not eating that!" And there was a feeling of guilt and failure when I woke, which is a lousy way to start my day. While on one hand it was nice to crunch through the things I'm not actually going to eat for a while, it really hit home that I have what may actually be food addictions.
Like many, I know what foods are good for me, and what ones I should avoid if I want to reach my goals. It's a little-picture/big-picture issue for me now. The little picture is my food cravings, and bad habits I miss. The big picture is the body I've always wanted and genuinely believe I can attain.
I'm so grateful that I've finally signed on with actual coaches, who will guide me and keep me honest as I continue to push towards the body I want MORE than sugar and fry. I'm also not going to weigh myself again until I'm supposed to, because I don't want to have the disappointing feeling I had this morning. I'm also going to be working my heart out on my cardio at the gym today, due to the moment of sad after the scale. Anything I can do to accelerate my progress is worth it.
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Sickness
A couple years ago, I'd use any excuse to skip the gym. Stubbed my toe, gotta nurse that. Got a runny nose, better stay home! To the point of OMG Hangnail, better "go home first" and take care of it or it'll annoy me at the gym! These excuses led to my ongoing inability to lose weight. They led to my sense of failure, and they led to my negative self image.
Now, I am one of those weird people who continue to work out unless they're confined-to-bed sick. After getting home from Seattle, my throat was swollen and sore, but I powered through it to enjoy my weekend, and it got me worse (or that may have been the natural progression of this bug) but I'm not skipping the gym ESPECIALLY on my new program because of a little head-bug.
Despite coughing up something that looked like a small treefrog, armed with Dayquil and Mucinex, I go, I lift my weights, I do my cardio, but I make sure to wash my hands and wipe down my equipment so I won't share my nasty with others.
I really, really hate being sick. I really hate being sick starting out this new plan, even though my stuffed up nose doesn't let me taste the asparagus I despise as much. What's really funny about this plan, is I'm in day 2, and I'm already tired of chewing. There is SO MUCH FOOD I have to eat, but it's low calorie, high nutrient food, so I'm probably flooding my poor sick system with precisely what it needs; good nutrition and vitamins while it works out this nasty bug.
I'd like to update that while I was dubious about my prescribed workout yesterday (I'd been doing much more intense workouts with intervals, high intensity cardio, and mid-set cardio spikes) I felt how effective my heavy weights were this morning when I hauled myself out of bed. I'm SORE. Sore for the first time in a long time. Like, not ouchy that's uncomfortable sore, but can I walk today will I be able to walk tomorrow sore. It's nice. While I'm no fan of pain, I know it's my body remaking itself stronger and to me, that's a great feeling. It's fantastic to know my time in the gym is a success, not just going through the motions to say I went. Change. It's happening. Now if I could just get rid of this danged head cold!
Now, I am one of those weird people who continue to work out unless they're confined-to-bed sick. After getting home from Seattle, my throat was swollen and sore, but I powered through it to enjoy my weekend, and it got me worse (or that may have been the natural progression of this bug) but I'm not skipping the gym ESPECIALLY on my new program because of a little head-bug.
Despite coughing up something that looked like a small treefrog, armed with Dayquil and Mucinex, I go, I lift my weights, I do my cardio, but I make sure to wash my hands and wipe down my equipment so I won't share my nasty with others.
I really, really hate being sick. I really hate being sick starting out this new plan, even though my stuffed up nose doesn't let me taste the asparagus I despise as much. What's really funny about this plan, is I'm in day 2, and I'm already tired of chewing. There is SO MUCH FOOD I have to eat, but it's low calorie, high nutrient food, so I'm probably flooding my poor sick system with precisely what it needs; good nutrition and vitamins while it works out this nasty bug.
I'd like to update that while I was dubious about my prescribed workout yesterday (I'd been doing much more intense workouts with intervals, high intensity cardio, and mid-set cardio spikes) I felt how effective my heavy weights were this morning when I hauled myself out of bed. I'm SORE. Sore for the first time in a long time. Like, not ouchy that's uncomfortable sore, but can I walk today will I be able to walk tomorrow sore. It's nice. While I'm no fan of pain, I know it's my body remaking itself stronger and to me, that's a great feeling. It's fantastic to know my time in the gym is a success, not just going through the motions to say I went. Change. It's happening. Now if I could just get rid of this danged head cold!
Friday, February 22, 2013
BACKTRACK
ERMAGRRRRD.
Spent a week in the rainy winter of Seattle, and though I got to experience the David Barton gym a couple days, I did NOT eat well and resultingly am feeling soft, squishy, and gross. I'm so painfully aware that my progress has been halted by my diet, that I finally made a decision. I made a commitment to myself. I made a financially backed choice to join a team, and get a coach (two, actually!) and change my body and my lifestyle 100%.
I want to share my ongoing progress as I have joined Prissy Sassy Fitness and am beyond excited to have two gorgeous, accomplished, and amazingly fit women guiding me towards my goals, as of this coming Monday! (Check them out of Facebook!)
Doing my personal assessment has become a matter of habit, but sticking to a diet is going to be new for me. So will be the results I believe I am capable of. My pics today. . .so not proud. But you know what? I'll be proud of them when I've improved against them. And since I'm so not proud of how I look right this minute, I'm going to post those pics only when I've seen a comparable change. Come on, Monday!
Spent a week in the rainy winter of Seattle, and though I got to experience the David Barton gym a couple days, I did NOT eat well and resultingly am feeling soft, squishy, and gross. I'm so painfully aware that my progress has been halted by my diet, that I finally made a decision. I made a commitment to myself. I made a financially backed choice to join a team, and get a coach (two, actually!) and change my body and my lifestyle 100%.
I want to share my ongoing progress as I have joined Prissy Sassy Fitness and am beyond excited to have two gorgeous, accomplished, and amazingly fit women guiding me towards my goals, as of this coming Monday! (Check them out of Facebook!)
Doing my personal assessment has become a matter of habit, but sticking to a diet is going to be new for me. So will be the results I believe I am capable of. My pics today. . .so not proud. But you know what? I'll be proud of them when I've improved against them. And since I'm so not proud of how I look right this minute, I'm going to post those pics only when I've seen a comparable change. Come on, Monday!
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